Cooper's 3rd Birthday

I can't believe he's...

Our cake lady was booked up this weekend so I tried out cake decorating.  Cooper LOVED it but I think I'll make cake plans earlier next year to get on her list! 

Can you tell he's excited? 

Ready to collect goodies from the pinata. 

Pin the Tail on Bullseye 

Bullseye Races:  Relay races on hobby horses! 

Present time! 

That evening, he had so much fun playing with all of his new toys. 

He even made my mom play Play-Doh Ice Cream Shop with him while I cleaned up toys and party 'stuff'. 

Happy Birthday Cooper! 

Four Months Waiting and a Three-Year-Old!

Baskin Robbins is the sensible choice for the number 31 on Cooper's birthday, right?  Yes, we've waited patiently for 4 months so far.  Yes, it's true we're not always so patient.  Yes, when I say 'we' I mean 'me'.  Yes, we've been in the thirties for what seems like for-ev-er!  Things started to pick back up this month and the clinic received their DNA test kits and were able to start processing more kiddos and get them referred to families.  Maybe it will really pick up once rainy season is over...which is soon!

I haven't been in the mood to write lately.  I have felt really disconnected with the whole adoption process.  I know we need to be doing fund raising but I just can't bring myself to solicit my family.  I just don't even want to think about it.  I know we need to be preparing for this baby that will someday be a part of our family but for now, all we've done is get Coop's big boy room ready (oh so fun!!) and pile baby stuff in the soon-to-be nursery.  There are so many thoughts in my head that I've been wanting to write on here and let everyone know what's going through this head of mine but I just can't focus enough to get them in writing.  After working my tail off to get my graduation complete this summer and school starting this past month, my brain feels fried and my body is certainly worn out.  Maybe I'll find the inspiration to write soon but for now, sorry.  It's just not coming.  Believe me, there's more in this head of mine than you can imagine!  :)

Today is Cooper's third birthday!!  He is SO much fun and has changed a lot lately.  I find myself thinking, "OH how I love this kid!," often throughout the day.  He is so incredibly lovable.  You may remember that he's obsessed with Toy Story....well, he had to have a Toy Story birthday party on Saturday.  I'll give it a post of its own within the next few days but until then, here's a teaser!

Three Months Waiting...Bittersweet

No news...none.  At least for the adoption.  Yesterday marked three months of waiting for us and we did not move a single spot on the waiting list.  There were no referrals of families ahead of us.  Although, I believe a precious little girl from the waiting children list was placed with a brand new adoptive family.  I know it's rainy season in Ethiopia and the courts have shut down for two months but referrals are still supposed to come in...so why aren't they??  Well, someone inquired about this on our CHI listserv yesterday and was told that the medical clinic (where the children are brought initially, before they go to an orphanage to be referred to families) was out of HIV test kits and were waiting on more but should receive more this week.  It sounded like there were children waiting to be tested and then sent on to orphanages or transition homes so maybe this rainy season will produce a 'flood' of referrals for so many anxious families.  Please keep this situation in your prayers!

It was so hard to go an entire month without moving up on the list when we had started out our wait moving very quickly.  

You said bittersweet...where's the 'sweetness'? 

Although yesterday was a difficult day in the adoption part of my life, it was also a very joyous day...I have my Master's Degree!!!  Should have happened last December but whatever...at least it's over now.  I haven't even taken a class since the Spring semester and have worked all summer trying to get the correct graduation requirements fulfilled.  SO FRUSTRATING!!  It's over and I just can't believe it!  I wasn't expecting this level of relief-incredible.  I just don't know what I'm going to do with my time.  Wait....yes I do.  I have to get Cooper into a big boy room and move all of his furniture to Baby Coco's room, paint his/her room, start planning bedding, work on major fundraisers such as Piece By Piece, a HUGE garage sale, photography, maybe a benefit dinner, plan Cooper's 3rd birthday party, make a Halloween costume, watch Toy Story for the millionth time........  Oh, and school (work) starts next week too.  I'm thankful that God has lifted this burden and helped me complete this accomplishment of grad school at the perfect time.

I have to continually remind myself that it is difficult to understand God's perfect timing when looking forward to the future.  He is in control and will provide.  When reflecting on the past, it is very clear to see his plan and how he works everything more amazingly than I could ever imagine.

Blog ADD

Ok, so I've had a little blog ADD lately.  I'm having a hard time getting a good format that I like and I keep changing my mind on what I want.  Someday, maybe I'll get comfortable with this space.  Bear with me until then!

Summer Vacation

I'm not one to enjoy being away from my child.  Most places we go, we take him with us.

Justin and I haven't had a vacation since our honeymoon 5 years ago.  Sure, we've taken a weekend to Dallas or Branson every once in a while but I would hardly consider those outings "vacations" and most of the time we have had Cooper with us.

A few weeks ago, we were able to spend an entire week in Destin, FL with some wonderful friends and it was amazing!  The cost was split among all 6 couples who went so it made it very economical...good thing, because I would have felt guilty otherwise since we're trying to save every penny possible for the adoption.  I did feel guilty about a few things though...while we were there I kept thinking about how much fun Cooper would have making a sand castle or digging up sea shells.  I could just see him making funny faces when the yucky salt water got in his mouth.  I'd never been away from him for a week but I think I only cried once for a short moment.  Not bad, huh?

What I didn't feel guilty about was having fun with friends, my honey, reading, knitting, cooking, shopping...just relaxing for the first time in a few years.  I didn't realize how much a career change, new baby/toddler and grad school had brought me down the past 3 years.  Wow.  Three years.

I know we won't ever have a vacation like that again.  It's okay with me.  This will hold me over for a long time.  It's exactly what we needed.  With the change about to occur with our family I know vacation may not even be possible for another five years...who knows.  

Oh, and I don't think Cooper didn't miss us near as much as we missed him!

The sandcastle we made in Cooper's honor...it kinda turned out to be an entire village!

My honey and me on the beach

Cooper...see the smiley face?

 

My Lindsey D and me

Just watch and think

(Scroll to the bottom of the page to pause the music before playing this.)

Our chips are all in

I really wish I had some spectacular news to tell everyone...I don't.  There haven't been any referrals in a few weeks.  Ethiopian courts are shutting down about now (or soon) for rainy season.  Referrals can still come in but not much gets processed until they're fully back open again in about two months or so.  We'll have to see how many referrals actually come in during this time.

Regardless, we are 'all in.'  There's no backing out, slowing down, hesitating for us.  We're in this thing and so ready for it all.  We're committed.

I found this quote today and it's really made me think...maybe it will make you do the same.

 German philosopher, Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832)

"Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness.  Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans:  that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too.  All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred.  A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way.  Whatever you do, or dream you can, begin it.  Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.  Begin it now."

Two Months Waiting

In honor of the MLB All Star Game tonight, our number today was brought to you by a jersey.  Yes, we're officially number 37 on the overall waiting list.  I got confirmation of that today.  We have moved up 17 spots in two months!!  I can't believe it!  I was curious about whether we should still plan on waiting the rest of the 7 months of the 9 month estimate and I was told yes, according to other families with similar preferences who are currently getting their referrals, they're waiting 9 months so that is what we should expect.  I certainly can't imagine waiting seven more months to move 37 spots though.  Also, I think the families who are currently getting referrals had more families ahead of them in line than we did starting out.  Hopefully this will be right and we'll get to see our sweet Coco's face much sooner than we expect!

Two months have gone by smoother than I had imagined...that kind of makes me nervous for the months to come!

Please continue to pray for a speedy process.

Baby Coco

We didn't let anyone know Cooper's name until he entered the world for various reasons.  Right now, I can't help but try to name this child we're waiting and praying for.  I'm having a little bit of a naming issue though. 

Cooper was named after family and because I'd always wanted to name a boy Cooper.  I've always had all of my children's names picked out, first and middle.  I have a whole list stored in my head that no one but Justin will ever know because no, we're not telling anyone before they arrive so why discuss it prior with anyone other than him?

This one's different.  I'm not sure if I can name a child of African descent something that would be considered a very "white" name such as Sarah or Liam or Austin or Jessica.  Yet, I don't really want their teacher to look at the class roster before school starts and assume the child is black (there is nothing wrong with this but I'd rather not anyone have preconceived notions about him/her). 

Is there such thing as a racial neutral name?

Because we didn't publicly name Cooper until he arrived, his name was El Chico...the boy as translated from Spanish.  Some lady heard us refer to him as El Chico while we were shopping once and she said, "Well, I guess Mama likes the Mexican food, huh?" very obnoxiously.  With my pregnant, hormone-induced attitude, I almost let her have it!  I was mad that she assumed I craved Mexican food and named my kid after El Chico, the restaurant.  Didn't everyone know that meant 'the boy'?  And hello!  I never craved anything while pregnant.  Plus, I was so diabetic at the time I couldn't have eaten there anyways.  But whatever.  I'm over it.  :)  Certainly not bitter about it whatsoever!

Back to the baby at hand....what to name it?  I have no idea.  It needs a name though.  I keep dreaming about that sweet, soft, chocolate skin.  Right now, I guess it's a baby cocoa bean in it's mommy's belly....Baby Coco it is.

Any naming suggestions you have will be considered...but don't be surprised if we don't tell the name until he or she is officially ours.

Sweetness

He melts my heart

I could leave it at that...but I won't.  He's a maniac...but denies it.  He loves freedom and independence...yet he's the sweetest snugglebug I've ever known.  I could go on all day...but I won't.

Awhile back, our household was hit by the "Toy Stoy" bug.  We have watched Toy Story and Toy Story 2 countless times in the past month, play with a set of miniature characters, memorized lines from the movies, taken pictures with Buzz Lightyear, and bought Woody PJ's. 

All the while, he never knew how excited I was to go see Toy Story 3!!  I couldn't wait.  Cooper has never been to the movie theater so we figured we'd go all out and see it in 3D at IMAX (he got in free!)......oh, and we got lemonade and popcorn, too.

WHY they didn't have kid-sized glasses is beyond me but oh well.  He kept them on and absolutely loved the movie.  If we could just figure out how to explain why we can't watch it at our house, we'd be doing great.

I thank God for Cooper's sweet, nurturing spirit.   He is always very concerned about the baby blankets I'm knitting for his new baby brother or sister.  He has also been asking a lot lately when the baby is coming and unfortunately, we don't have any answers for him.  We just say, "someday."  We think he understands this just a little.  Well, this weekend he asked for literally HOURS where the baby brother or sister is and when they were coming. 

It's conversations like this that absolutely melt me....
C:  When's baby brudur or sistur comin, Daddy?
J:  Soon, but they're not ready to come here yet.
C:  (Looking up, thinking, you can see his wheels turning)
J:  Do you know who's making the baby?
C:  Jesus!
J:  You're right!
C:  Well, where IS Jesus?
J:  He's in heaven.  Do you know where heaven is?
C:  It's a surprise!

A little while later he was actually boo-hooing in hysterics because he wanted this baby to come here to our house NOW.  We snuggled, talked, calmed down.  I got his beach ball globe and we talked about where we lived and where the baby brother or sister will be and that Mommy and Daddy will have to get it someday.  This seemed to satisfy him (it's not the first time we've done this). 

But then I got to thinking...he loves babies and he really loves this baby doll at my mom's house that she got for the girls.  Maybe Cooper would like to have a baby doll of his own and it would satisfy his anxiety/curiosity of the upcoming sibling.  Boys playing with dolls really isn't a big deal to me.  I think it's good for them to learn to take care of something and show love in that way.  Now, pink, frilly, princess or Barbie-ish is NOT okay.  :)

We went to Toys R Us the next day to pick out a simple, somewhat gender neutral baby doll (preferably not white).  Cooper was super excited and he said it needed baby bottles like the one at Nana's house.  We were on the search...

I found a sweet, soft little brown skinned baby doll and took it to Cooper and asked what he thought of it.  His reply?  "Oh, it's a black baby!!"  I said, "WHAT??  What kind of baby is this?"  "A black baby," he said again.  I had no idea he even knew that term!  He said it as if it were simply an observation and he has absolutely no problem with the baby or even the thought that we would have a black baby.  It was totally innocent.

I'm not sure exactly where he picked that one up but I'm just thankful it wasn't condescending in any way.  He has always been exposed to diverse people, we read Ethiopian adoption blogs of others and look at babies' pictures and we see kids of different races at church and he sees them in class at school as well.  He especially loves his big friend, Eric, who has spent some time at our house recently and he's African American.  I feel that we've done a pretty good job of exposing Cooper to diversity while not necessarily pointing out differences among people.  We see everyone so much the same and try to push away stereotypes.  Now we know he sees the differences among people and for now, it's only an observation.

Well, the baby made it home with us, along with a set of bottles with juice and milk.  He has decided this baby is a boy and it's name is Baby Goo.  Because the baby brother or sister is getting blankets made for it, Baby Goo also needed a blanket and pillow.  I let Cooper pick out some fabric from my stash...errr, wall o' fabric....and he chose the choo choo trains!  I whipped up this little creation in time for them to both lay down for their afternoon nap together.

After his nap we went to eat dinner with Granny and Pa, who had just gotten back from a trip.  He just had to take Baby Goo with him to show off.  I caught them holding hands in the back seat!

And when grandparents come home from a trip, what do they bring?  Souvenirs!  Cooper got a brand new harmonica along with some other lovely goodies.  He's pretty good at it, too!

Oh how I love this boy.  He's so trusting of his father and me.  He's a straightforward and honest little boy.  He has such a sense of wonder about him.  Yet, a nurturer and snugglebug he is.

The next project

I can't wait to see how all of this knits up!  It's soooo snuggly soft!

And we're countin' 'em down!

Referrals!!  There have been a couple in the past few weeks and then there were FIVE of them today!!  To my best calculations, we should be approximately number....

How much is enough?

I think I just found the next book in queue.  It's actually a follow-up book to, "Same Kind of Different Than Me" so I guess there'll be two.  They're written by Ron Hall, a wealthy art dealer, and Denver Moore, a former homeless man.  I read this excerpt on another blog and realized that this is exactly where my heart has been lately.

 

Since I been visitin a lotta churches, I hear people talkin 'bout how, after readin our story, they felt "led" to help the homeless, to come alongside the down-and-out.  But when it comes to helpin people that ain't got much, God didn't leave no room for feelin led.  

Jesus said God gon' separate us based on what we did for folks that is hungry and thirsty, fellas that is prisoners in jail and folks that ain't got no clothes and no place to live.  What you gon' do when you get to heaven and you ain't done none a' that?  Stand in front a' God and tell Him, "I didn't feel led"? 

You know what He gon' say?  He gon' say, "You didn't need to feel led 'cause I had done wrote it down in the Instruction Book."

Let's be real.  A lotta folks on the list that Jesus calls "the least of these" ain't the ones you gon' find down at the country club.  No, most a' them's the folks you gon' find in the jail or in the street.  But we got to go to all the people - the rich, the poor, the lowdown, and the dirty - and show 'em all we got the same thing for ever one of 'em: the love a' the Lord.  

I think part a' this problem is that too many folks ain't ready to face up to the fact that to love the unlovable, they got to face people that they fear.  They is afraid to get out of their regular livin space 'cause they afraid it might be suicide, am I right? 'Cause you wouldn't be scared a' nobody if you didn't feel like they was gon' do you wrong. 

Most people want to be circled by safety, not by the unexpected.  The unexpected can take you out.  But the unexpected can also take you over and change your life.  Put a heart in your body where a stone used to be. 

Encouragement for today

I stumbled upon this scripture today. Doesn't it always seem that you are led to the right scripture at exactly the right time?  Pretty cool.

So let's not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don't give up. Galatians 6:9 NLT

One Month Waiting

We've been waiting for exactly one month and we've moved up the waiting list approximately 10 spots!!  Way ahead of the estimate!  Woo Hoo!

The past month has been so busy with our 5th anniversary, finishing up school, etc. that I haven't had much computer time.  That is sure to change this summer, though.  

We have a lot going on in this house that I'll write about when I have more time.  Until then, I just want to say I have been encouraged by others' thoughtful words lately.  There are some really wonderful people in this world and I'm thankful to call several of them friends of mine.  

Today, my heart smiles.

Baby girl info

I received a reply to our request for records of the sweet baby girl I mentioned yesterday.  It seems many families are interested in her and there is already a family who is reviewing the records.  If they decline, the information will then be sent on to the next person who requested it.  This baby girl is just so special and wonderful, I'm sure she will find her forever family very soon and the reality is, it probably won't be us.  That's okay.  God's timing is perfect.  Not just right, but perfect.

Some great news is that we have been on the waiting list for 7 days now and there have been 6 referrals!  Congrats to all of the new families!  It puts us at #48 already and I'm really trying to not get my hopes up and be too confident that everything will be quick and smooth.  Praying it happens that way anyways!

First day of MDO

Cooper had a WONDERFUL time at Mother's Day Out today!  He ate all of his lunch from his fire truck lunchbox, played with new friends, napped, and made a wind sock that got hung up in his bedroom this afternoon.  He has no idea when "Tuesday" is, but he can't wait for it so he can go back again!

I got to leave school for a few minutes to meet him and Granny there so I could walk him in on his very first day!  And once again, if you couldn't tell, he hates getting his picture made.

Some more crazy ideas!

Cooper starts Mother's Day Out tomorrow and he's super pumped about getting to go to school.  We had to pack up extra clothes, a blanket, etc. for him to take and leave there.  While we were picking out his green blanket that he wanted so badly at Wally World, we decided to get him a little travel pillow as well.  Do they make tiny pillow cases for these things?  I have no idea.  That leads me to crazy idea #1 of the evening...I'll go home and sew up a quick little pillow case and Cooper can pick out what kind of fabric he wants!  I got the usual eye roll from the husband, ignored it, and told Coop how much fun it would be.  Heeheehee.  He "shopped" in my wall o' fabric and picked the blue puppies.  Isn't it cute?  Don't worry, it didn't take long but it also didn't get ironed before cut and sewn so it's a little wrinkled.

Crazy idea #2...I saw that there is a 2 month old baby girl on the waiting child list for our agency.  She has some somewhat unknown special needs and is SO beautiful and SO tiny!  Still not quite 7 lbs. yet and 2 mo. old.   We are approved for special needs to some extent but the past week (since being on the waiting list) I have thought long and hard about expanding our preferences to include other, maybe long term special needs.  This baby has a very interesting story and she is in NEED of a loving home.  We requested her information and more medical records that weren't posted on the website.  She was just posted this evening and I know of at least 2 families for sure who have requested her information before us.  We'll see what happens.  If we are able to review her records, I'll request to have someone at Arkansas Children's Hospital check them out and see what all she may need.  I'm so excited to think that there's even a possibility of getting this teeny tiny beauty!  Please pray!  I'll update with more as soon as I find out anything.

First Purchase

Isn't it cute?  Cooper got a frog lovey just like this from some good friends of ours as a shower gift and he sleeps with it EVERY night so I wanted something similar for the new baby.  Since we're official I can start buying a few things now...right?  I have just about decided on the nursery colors (yellow and gray) and figured a giraffe would work for either gender, especially from Africa.  So here it is in all of its squishy goodness.