Cooper was in desperate need of a haircut so we went to Wally World to get a new movie to keep him occupied and still so I could cut his hair. Of course he found a new Curious George movie that he wanted but then I saw Tarzan. It was one of my absolute favorite Disney movies! We went ahead and got it also....more for me than for him!
As I cut his hair, we watched George but Cooper got tired of it and wanted to see the new movie. It's been several years since I'd seen it and I was quickly reminded of what a sweet story it was. I was reminded that it's a great lesson in acceptance and love that has no boundaries. This mama saw a baby in need, took it in as her own and raised it no matter what others around her (even family) had to say. I'm thankful Cooper really took to this movie because maybe it could be used someday to help him understand our family if/when he has questions about it. God continues to place circumstances in front of us to let us know this decision is from him. I love the concept of "Two Worlds, One Family."
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Piece By Piece
I will not discuss money and fundraising issues much on this blog. That's not the purpose of the blog. We have set up another website to track our fundraising.
We have had several people request Bottle Banks and we are so excited for that!!
The next thing we're doing is a puzzle...we're calling it Piece By Piece. We have linked this website on the right side bar and here. We have a 550 piece puzzle and are allowing you to sponsor it. Each sponsorship is $10 per piece. You may purchase one or several. As pieces are sponsored, your name will go on the back of the piece(s) and we will put it together. When our child comes home, they will be able to see the puzzle on the wall of their room for years to come and know that they are here with us because of these people. I can't wait to see how cool this turns out!
Guilting and manipulating friends and family into giving money to the way we have chosen to grow our family isn't right. Like I said before, I won't talk about it much on here. However, if you want to help out we will be forever grateful. I know God will provide however he sees fit and if it's through the kind hearts of friends and family, we are thankful for that. Our Piece By Piece website will discuss any and all fundraising that we will be doing. You can donate directly, contact by email, and read up on different ideas we're tossing around. If you have suggestions or comments, please feel free to let us know through that site. Go check it out!
We have had several people request Bottle Banks and we are so excited for that!!
The next thing we're doing is a puzzle...we're calling it Piece By Piece. We have linked this website on the right side bar and here. We have a 550 piece puzzle and are allowing you to sponsor it. Each sponsorship is $10 per piece. You may purchase one or several. As pieces are sponsored, your name will go on the back of the piece(s) and we will put it together. When our child comes home, they will be able to see the puzzle on the wall of their room for years to come and know that they are here with us because of these people. I can't wait to see how cool this turns out!
Guilting and manipulating friends and family into giving money to the way we have chosen to grow our family isn't right. Like I said before, I won't talk about it much on here. However, if you want to help out we will be forever grateful. I know God will provide however he sees fit and if it's through the kind hearts of friends and family, we are thankful for that. Our Piece By Piece website will discuss any and all fundraising that we will be doing. You can donate directly, contact by email, and read up on different ideas we're tossing around. If you have suggestions or comments, please feel free to let us know through that site. Go check it out!
Home Study...Part One
Our home study was scheduled for Thursday afternoon at 4:30. I stressed all week, cleaned and organized, stressed a little more about our 'junk room', and then she didn't even show! I was so frustrated but she called and said she was having major car issues and she would be unable to come. We rescheduled for 9:00 this morning. The meeting went well and Cooper was well-behaved. After talking/touring for about an hour and a half, she was done and on her way. No worries there. Our next appointment will be on Friday afternoon, March 12 at her office. Soon after that, the home study will be complete and we can move on to the immigration process.
Everything has been moving so smoothly that I've been afraid that something is going to go major wrong. I was checking on immigration stuff tonight, as it's the next part of the process. Well, there may be our hiccup...the closest immigration office is in in the next state over! I thought that it would be easy since we were in the capital city and we would be able to make arrangements after work, lunch breaks, etc. NOPE! Grrrr! Oh well, I can only control the things I can control and this certainly isn't one of those! At least the home study is proceeding well. Maybe it will be done by Spring Break and I can get immigration papers started while I have some time off.
Everything has been moving so smoothly that I've been afraid that something is going to go major wrong. I was checking on immigration stuff tonight, as it's the next part of the process. Well, there may be our hiccup...the closest immigration office is in in the next state over! I thought that it would be easy since we were in the capital city and we would be able to make arrangements after work, lunch breaks, etc. NOPE! Grrrr! Oh well, I can only control the things I can control and this certainly isn't one of those! At least the home study is proceeding well. Maybe it will be done by Spring Break and I can get immigration papers started while I have some time off.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
What awesome friends we have!!
These past few days have been full of telling friends our happy news and a little bit of nerves.....okay, a lot of nerves! I was somewhat nervous about letting everyone know about our adoption because I do know there is some controversy to it and I wasn't sure how I would handle the possiblity of insensitive or uneducated responses. I always dread the worst and so far, all we have received has been pure encouragement! Thank you for all of the sweet comments, hugs, excited squeals, and thoughtful emails. You have calmed my head and given me some affirmation that we really are doing what is best for our family. Thank you for telling me what a great big brother Cooper will be someday. I have tears just thinking about it. I thank God that he has given us such a sensitive, loving child who will no doubt be a helper and very protective of a younger sibling. We are so appreciative of the love we have been shown by all of you!
On a little bit of a different note, to explain my fears, I'll try hard not to make this sound like a rant but I just want to make something clear...In no way do we think that our adoption will even put a dent in the orphan crisis around the world. It is definitely one reason why I have always wanted to adopt and we chose specifically Ethiopia partially for this reason also but I just don't want anyone to think that we are trying to 'save the world', have a child as our charity case or think that we want a little 'trophy' baby. This is our family we're talking about and as always, God comes first and we look to him when making decisions. We are trusting his guidance and know that he will complete our family. If we truly believe that he knows us before we are born and he knits us together in our mothers' womb, how can we not believe that God is preparing a child for us right now? I love being a mom and I love children. I have no ulterior motive. How did I do? Too rant-ish? Sorry.
On a little bit of a different note, to explain my fears, I'll try hard not to make this sound like a rant but I just want to make something clear...In no way do we think that our adoption will even put a dent in the orphan crisis around the world. It is definitely one reason why I have always wanted to adopt and we chose specifically Ethiopia partially for this reason also but I just don't want anyone to think that we are trying to 'save the world', have a child as our charity case or think that we want a little 'trophy' baby. This is our family we're talking about and as always, God comes first and we look to him when making decisions. We are trusting his guidance and know that he will complete our family. If we truly believe that he knows us before we are born and he knits us together in our mothers' womb, how can we not believe that God is preparing a child for us right now? I love being a mom and I love children. I have no ulterior motive. How did I do? Too rant-ish? Sorry.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
How did we get here?
Ok, so the word has begun to spread and today I will make this blog public. We have been able to tell our families and a few friends so I guess it's time to let everyone else in on this fun little secret we've been keeping! If you're reading this for the first time, go back to the first post and work through to this one...it may answer some questions. We have anticipated more questions to come and we will try our best to answer them the best that we can. Even if the best we can say is, "Because this is what God has planned for our family." Sooooooo, just in case you're wondering...Why? When? What if?
What led up to this decision?
Years and years of God working in our lives! I just remembered today about a youth rally of some sort...maybe it was college...all I know is that I remember one message: Prayer is a powerful thing so don't take it for granted. God does amazing things that you would never dream of. Pray for a country or continent NOW. Pray for them and how God can use you there. See what happens. Well, I chose Africa. I prayed these prayers off and on for months when I thought about it but then those thoughts were forgotten. When I realized this tonight, it was almost one of those weird epiphany moments. Like, wow, God really is that great! My earthly mind can't quite comprehend this.
Why adoption?
I have always wanted to adopt, ever since I was little. When thinking of future family planning, I've always added at least one adopted child in the 'perfect' family number in my head. Plus, I have several friends who are adopted and I have always admired their families.
I believe God has answered my prayers about where to take our family next. I have asked him to show us what route to go for expanding our family and this was the path that he cleared for us.
Will you have more biological children?
Maybe. If it's in God's plan for us to have more, we will.
Why didn't you choose Romania?
Simple. They don't allow international adoption anymore after there was so much child trafficing for years after communism fell. It's sad because Romania has a special place in our hearts.
Why Ethiopia?
You read the part about the power of prayer, right?
The easy answer here is that when CHI sent me an email that I saw in the middle of the school day, I read about the Ethiopia program and looked around at my students (majority do not look like me) and thought about how well an Ethiopian child might fit in around here. It just made sense. God made it so clear in my heart that this was what I was supposed to do.
Not only that, but I have always loved Africa. I used to want to move there to be a missionary but thought that it was a rediculous feat. I got a Health Care Missions minor at Harding (my transcript doesn't even show it, grrrrr) in hopes that I would be able to do regular short term medical mission work there. When looking into international adoption, Ethiopia seemed to have some of the greatest need. With the AIDS epidemic and extreme poverty, there are so many orphans who need a loving home. I could go on all day about this.
Where IS Ethiopia? :)
East Africa. It's next to the Red Sea and bordered by Kenya, Sudan and Somalia.
Do you know what the child will be like?
They allow requests but we were pretty generic with ours. Cooper is our first born and will be always be the oldest. We do not want to adopt/place a child out of birth order because there will be enough transition for Cooper as it is. Losing his position in the family would make it much more difficult for him. We decided to request a healthy infant under 12 months of either gender. The babies are tested for HIV, TB and Hepatitis. We will be given all, if any, medical records for the baby. Coming from an extremely impoverished country, there will likely be some malnutrition or delayed development of some type. This is not anything negative towards the birthfamily or country. It's just the consequences of the situation. The babies are very well taken care of by the nannies at the House of Hope. This is the home run by our adoption agency. It's more like a foster home than an institution. Just knowing this gives me comfort.
Why did you choose international over domestic adoption? Oh, and isn't it way more expensive?
Ok, here's the controversial question. I will keep this short. When weighing between the two, we decided that first of all, our family is not ready for foster care or foster to adopt programs. With a toddler in the house and many outside of the home responsibilities, it's just not an option right now although, it may be a consideration on down the road. Next would be domestic infant adoption but we were uncomfortable with all of the possible issues that may accompany that situation. In the end, we chose to go with international adoption using a reputable agency. What it comes down to is that we feel God led us in this specific route for a reason. No doubt about it. What matters is that we have been given the opportunity to give a child a loving home that is so desperately needed. It doesn't matter where they come from.
Generally, the cost is about the same with domestic infant or international.
Where are you in the process?
We have been approved by the agency, we are starting on the home study and gathering documents for the dossier now.
How long is the wait?
We will send our dossier (documentation packet) within the next 2-3 months. After that, it could take 11+ months for a referral of a child. After that, it could be another 4 months before we pass court and travel. We will be in Ethiopia for about a week.
Is there anything I can do to help you?
Pray. Pray things go smoothly and quickly. Pray for our patience in waiting. I told some friends the other day that our baby probably hasn't even been conceived yet, which blows my mind. In light of that, pray for mommy and baby. Health. Comfort. I have no idea what situation the mom will be encountering to make her choose to relinquish the baby, but whatever she is facing....pray for her. I can't imagine what the next year or so holds for her. Pray that our community will be accepting of our family and the differences it will have that I find so beautiful. Pray that God will prepare Cooper for this. He's gonna be an awesome big brother!
Sorry this got so long! I have SO much to say and I know no one wants it all in one sitting.
What led up to this decision?
Years and years of God working in our lives! I just remembered today about a youth rally of some sort...maybe it was college...all I know is that I remember one message: Prayer is a powerful thing so don't take it for granted. God does amazing things that you would never dream of. Pray for a country or continent NOW. Pray for them and how God can use you there. See what happens. Well, I chose Africa. I prayed these prayers off and on for months when I thought about it but then those thoughts were forgotten. When I realized this tonight, it was almost one of those weird epiphany moments. Like, wow, God really is that great! My earthly mind can't quite comprehend this.
Why adoption?
I have always wanted to adopt, ever since I was little. When thinking of future family planning, I've always added at least one adopted child in the 'perfect' family number in my head. Plus, I have several friends who are adopted and I have always admired their families.
I believe God has answered my prayers about where to take our family next. I have asked him to show us what route to go for expanding our family and this was the path that he cleared for us.
Will you have more biological children?
Maybe. If it's in God's plan for us to have more, we will.
Why didn't you choose Romania?
Simple. They don't allow international adoption anymore after there was so much child trafficing for years after communism fell. It's sad because Romania has a special place in our hearts.
Why Ethiopia?
You read the part about the power of prayer, right?
The easy answer here is that when CHI sent me an email that I saw in the middle of the school day, I read about the Ethiopia program and looked around at my students (majority do not look like me) and thought about how well an Ethiopian child might fit in around here. It just made sense. God made it so clear in my heart that this was what I was supposed to do.
Not only that, but I have always loved Africa. I used to want to move there to be a missionary but thought that it was a rediculous feat. I got a Health Care Missions minor at Harding (my transcript doesn't even show it, grrrrr) in hopes that I would be able to do regular short term medical mission work there. When looking into international adoption, Ethiopia seemed to have some of the greatest need. With the AIDS epidemic and extreme poverty, there are so many orphans who need a loving home. I could go on all day about this.
Where IS Ethiopia? :)
East Africa. It's next to the Red Sea and bordered by Kenya, Sudan and Somalia.
Do you know what the child will be like?
They allow requests but we were pretty generic with ours. Cooper is our first born and will be always be the oldest. We do not want to adopt/place a child out of birth order because there will be enough transition for Cooper as it is. Losing his position in the family would make it much more difficult for him. We decided to request a healthy infant under 12 months of either gender. The babies are tested for HIV, TB and Hepatitis. We will be given all, if any, medical records for the baby. Coming from an extremely impoverished country, there will likely be some malnutrition or delayed development of some type. This is not anything negative towards the birthfamily or country. It's just the consequences of the situation. The babies are very well taken care of by the nannies at the House of Hope. This is the home run by our adoption agency. It's more like a foster home than an institution. Just knowing this gives me comfort.
Why did you choose international over domestic adoption? Oh, and isn't it way more expensive?
Ok, here's the controversial question. I will keep this short. When weighing between the two, we decided that first of all, our family is not ready for foster care or foster to adopt programs. With a toddler in the house and many outside of the home responsibilities, it's just not an option right now although, it may be a consideration on down the road. Next would be domestic infant adoption but we were uncomfortable with all of the possible issues that may accompany that situation. In the end, we chose to go with international adoption using a reputable agency. What it comes down to is that we feel God led us in this specific route for a reason. No doubt about it. What matters is that we have been given the opportunity to give a child a loving home that is so desperately needed. It doesn't matter where they come from.
Generally, the cost is about the same with domestic infant or international.
Where are you in the process?
We have been approved by the agency, we are starting on the home study and gathering documents for the dossier now.
How long is the wait?
We will send our dossier (documentation packet) within the next 2-3 months. After that, it could take 11+ months for a referral of a child. After that, it could be another 4 months before we pass court and travel. We will be in Ethiopia for about a week.
Is there anything I can do to help you?
Pray. Pray things go smoothly and quickly. Pray for our patience in waiting. I told some friends the other day that our baby probably hasn't even been conceived yet, which blows my mind. In light of that, pray for mommy and baby. Health. Comfort. I have no idea what situation the mom will be encountering to make her choose to relinquish the baby, but whatever she is facing....pray for her. I can't imagine what the next year or so holds for her. Pray that our community will be accepting of our family and the differences it will have that I find so beautiful. Pray that God will prepare Cooper for this. He's gonna be an awesome big brother!
Sorry this got so long! I have SO much to say and I know no one wants it all in one sitting.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Snow Day!!
We woke up this morning to a snowy surprise! School was called off and we were able to relax and watch the huge, cotton balls of snow flakes fall. It was so beautiful!
We realized the pantry was pretty bare and the storm was going to get worse before it gets better so we ventured out to Walmart with all of the other crazies. While frantically clearing the shelves, I got a phone call from our social worker!! I can't believe she called today! She said she was working from home and apologized for not calling Friday afternoon. Wow, this is a huge change from the home study agency I thought we would use. I asked if she could call back later in the afternoon when we could talk a little more. She called back right on time and we booked our home visit for next week!! This snow day can't get much better. We have a lot of work to do between now and next Thursday, the 18th. God is good and he WILL provide.
I'll post pictures of our fun day later.
We realized the pantry was pretty bare and the storm was going to get worse before it gets better so we ventured out to Walmart with all of the other crazies. While frantically clearing the shelves, I got a phone call from our social worker!! I can't believe she called today! She said she was working from home and apologized for not calling Friday afternoon. Wow, this is a huge change from the home study agency I thought we would use. I asked if she could call back later in the afternoon when we could talk a little more. She called back right on time and we booked our home visit for next week!! This snow day can't get much better. We have a lot of work to do between now and next Thursday, the 18th. God is good and he WILL provide.
I'll post pictures of our fun day later.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Fundraising - Bottle Banks
Adoption is expensive. Whether it is domestic or international, it's usually around 18k. (Of course, going through foster care is a different situation altogether.) All programs and agencies are different but this is usually the ballpark figure. Unfortunately, the Adoption Tax Credit of $12,500 is set to expire this December and there's no way our adoption will be final before that. I just keep seeing this money mountain before me get bigger and bigger as the days go on. From the beginning of this journey we knew that there would be no way we could afford it but we also knew that this is God's doing and he will provide as he sees fit. There is no doubt in my mind that we will come up with all of the money. Having said that, we do not intend on asking anyone for large sums of money. It's our decision, our family and our responsibility. However, a few people have already asked how they can help out and this is how I'm responding to their sweet offers of kindness: Bottle Banks
We are huge change collectors. Especially Justin. He just dumps all of his change in any place he feels. Once, we gathered it all up from the car, kitchen drawers, night stand, etc. and found that we had $120!!! Who knew? Since then we have collected change and cashed it in on a regular basis and it pays for dates and such. You know, the extras in life. Because we know that every little bit of change adds up to a lot, we have made "Bottle Banks." They are a way for others to help contribute to our adoption without being a burden on anyone. Just collect your change in the bottle and when it's full, return it to us. If you want to continue doing it, let us know and we'll give you an empty bottle to fill again.
This is just one simple way God is providing...through your 'extras'. He has also shown me another idea, which I'll share some time next week. Very cool.
This is what's keeping me sane today! :) God will provide.
25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
28"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 6:25-34
We are huge change collectors. Especially Justin. He just dumps all of his change in any place he feels. Once, we gathered it all up from the car, kitchen drawers, night stand, etc. and found that we had $120!!! Who knew? Since then we have collected change and cashed it in on a regular basis and it pays for dates and such. You know, the extras in life. Because we know that every little bit of change adds up to a lot, we have made "Bottle Banks." They are a way for others to help contribute to our adoption without being a burden on anyone. Just collect your change in the bottle and when it's full, return it to us. If you want to continue doing it, let us know and we'll give you an empty bottle to fill again.
This is just one simple way God is providing...through your 'extras'. He has also shown me another idea, which I'll share some time next week. Very cool.
25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
28"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 6:25-34
Saturday, February 6, 2010
One step forward, three steps back
I'm so frustrated this morning. The agency that we have chosen to do our home study has been a total disappointment. They were friendly on the phone and sent all of our paperwork promptly last week, so initially I was impressed. We played phone tag for about 2 days and then I haven't heard back from them for over a week. I have questions about the application, which should have been turned in as soon as I filled it out last week but I haven't been able to reach them. Their address is only a PO box, their website doesn't work, I can't get a phone call returned and the email I sent came back to me. I'm SO done with them! But I can't just be done, I have to go back and request several forms from Children's Hope because I went ahead and filled them out with this other agency's name on them. We have just lost a week! If we can't even get this home study started, who knows how long this process will take...just frustrated.
The good news is, I contacted another home study agency yesterday by email inquiry and I already heard back a response and the lady seemed so nice. Maybe we can get more forms from CHI and the application for the home study complete next week so this train can keep on moving!
Besides that, there is a blog post I've been working on for a few days now and it's not finished, Cooper has been sick for a week (finally has meds and getting better), I'm behind on my UALR work, I'm behind on grading, and I have way too much to do this weekend. Can we say overwhelmed?
I'm going to enjoy the quiet house for a bit longer and just relax, knowing my boys are still sleeping and there are cinnamon rolls in the oven.
The good news is, I contacted another home study agency yesterday by email inquiry and I already heard back a response and the lady seemed so nice. Maybe we can get more forms from CHI and the application for the home study complete next week so this train can keep on moving!
Besides that, there is a blog post I've been working on for a few days now and it's not finished, Cooper has been sick for a week (finally has meds and getting better), I'm behind on my UALR work, I'm behind on grading, and I have way too much to do this weekend. Can we say overwhelmed?
I'm going to enjoy the quiet house for a bit longer and just relax, knowing my boys are still sleeping and there are cinnamon rolls in the oven.
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